propecia prices

Home

Glossary of Trading Terms and Phrases

Better Lucky than Smart The only thing we have going for us.

Buyer OutsideSomething sales traders say to force your hand when they get tired of watching you play stock market.

Clean up If you believe that I have a bridge to show you.

CSA – Clusterfuckk Service Alternative:  When it’s easier for your client to just write a check rather than trade with your team of farm animals.

DFIU The latest IM catch phrase meaning “Don’t F**k It Up”.

Discount Bid – Chinese trading fire drill.  There’s a 1 in 10,000 chance you actually get a trade on at the price but it’s a good exercise for going through the motions and a great way to kill a few minutes and piss some people off.

Down a Touch – This thing just came off like a prom dress.

Fair and ReasonableSomething the buy-side has no concept of.

Fast Money– Just means they’ve got money moving out the door quicker.

Fill or Kill – Respond this second or deal with the consequences of this extremely illiquid stock not trading and me miraculously catching a second buyer who wants to bid you for the exact same amount in about a half hour or so.

Find out who’s moving the stock Pick a name out of a hat.

Floor Looks: The only way to be 100% wrong 100% of the time.

Good Guy – Doesn’t ask me any difficult questions.

Great Guy– Doesn’t ask me any difficult questions and gives me business.

Happy“Happy to get involved”, “Happy to get you started” – Although coming across like Mr. Sunshine, It’s Wall Street’s way of reminding you that your sales trader is just a whore at heart and willing to take one in the keester if it gets him an order.

Hedge Fund HotelsCrowded names; like roach motels… only now with phone taps.

I have a call into my analyst – If it’s important, go get the info somewhere else.

I won’t embarrass you: Unbuckle your pants.

I’ll just make one callI will make sure you’re the only client who gets blocked while we super message your indication to the entire planet.

Intelligent Questions“Why is XYZ down 8%” – translates into help me get my PM off my back.

In the Know: Jewish.

In Touch With (ITW) – Often fabricated by sales traders.  It’s the practice of throwing lots of shit at the wall and seeing what sticks.

ITW 2 Ways I have no opinion on the stock or any idea what’s going on in the room because I’ve been surfing the web for the past three hours and I need to get involved.

It Wasn’t Me – Of course it was me.  Stocks don’t move like that by themselves.

Lay Up You’re f**ked and/or customer wants something.

Make it Right: Let’s ignore all those pesky rules, regulations and what actually traded for a minute.

More Behind – It doesn’t matter who’s saying it, it means the customer doesn’t trust his coverage enough to give him his whole number.

Must Be the Program Desk– That’s how you explain to an inquiring account about a stock you’re #1 in but failed to shop even once.

Natural – This is the term brokers use and pretend to have when you’re stupid enough to mention interest in a name.  Beware sales traders who like to use the term natural  It’s like somebody who volunteers the term honestly after a statement.  Usually ‘natural’ is as unnatural as Chastity Bono’s surgically manipulated genitalia.

Nine to Five Jobs – Storybook fairy tales told to blue-collar children.

On the side-lines– Synonymous with you’re done for the day and I’m moving on to the next broker.

Open Up Down–  If you hear somebody say “the stock is going to open up down fifty cents”, that’s code for they should be flipping burgers for a living and you need to hang up the phone immediately.

Options Related – Any 7 figure trade you’re too lazy to explore must have been “options related.”

Plugged – Just like it sounds, only you don’t have time to reach for the KY.

PM Limit Sure it is.

Seller is over-the-day:  I really have nothing and was lying the entire time to try and get you in.

Short Squeeze– explanation given for any stock up more than 4% when you’re too busy with another client to check it out.

Smart Money– 65% of that crowd has gone out of business over the past 18 months and half of what’s left is either getting squeezed or subpoenaed.  There is no smart money.

Systems Problem – I owe you a print.  I’m just scrambling to figure out how much stock I missed so I know how much to print you on.

Straight home– 2am best.

Step it OutApril Fools!

Takes me out of the name– there’s a few million more.  I’ll just pretend to catch another seller tomorrow… or later.

Top Tick – Usually paid by institutional buyers

Traded AwayYour client just douched you.

Treat me Subject I’m indecisive and want to make sure it’s going my way first.

Understood I’m not sure what you just said so I’m just gonna wing it and hope you don’t call.  Click HERE for a complete understanding.

Wanted to Let it Trade Without Me– I went outside for lunch and totally forgot I put a limit on the f**king thing.

VWAPNo conviction.

Vanilla– Generic account description used when sales trader is either A) Too lazy to investigate further.  B) Setting up fantasy football roster for upcoming week and is too lazy to investigate further… or C) Never heard of account before and is too lazy to investigate further.

Wake Up– “You want me to wake you up somewhere?”… This way I can totally fail notice when it gets there and embarrass myself yet again.

We’re big boys, we can take it– Son of a bitch! That stung like a mother f**ker.

Work to Improve – Term is normally used in a derogatory tone in a useless attempt to help improve the less than impressive job you’ve done so far.

-Dopey

“Do the best you can, and don’t take life too serious.” – Will Rogers

Read more of Dopey’s favorites HERE.

23 Responses

  1. Al Veoli Says:

    This is why us fellas get more than one babe to “plug”. You have to keep the wife (BEEOTCH) in check.

    A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, says she’ll see him later and walks away.

    His wife glares at him and says, “Who the hell was that?”

    “Oh,” replies the husband, “she’s my mistress.”

    “Well, that’s the last straw,” says the wife. “I’ve had enough, I want a divorce.”

    “I can understand that,” replies her husband, “but remember, if we get a divorce it means that you don’t get any more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Ferrari and Lexus in the garage and no more yacht club. But the decision is yours.”

    Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with another gorgeous babe on his arm.

    “Who’s that woman with Jim?” asks the wife.

    “That’s his mistress,” says her husband.

    “Ours is prettier,” she replies.=======

    ============
    Let that be a lesson, fellas. It will cost you for another babe, but it’s worth it.

  2. Desperado Says:

    Al? Seriously… WTF?

  3. Desperado Says:

    Like Aces would say… Think warm bath and razor blades…. warm bath and razor blades…. warm bath an razor blades

  4. Al Veoli Says:

    What about “WE ARE LOOKING AT A NAME” —

    This means our MD got stuck last night with a large block of crappy stock from his best client, and we must now dump it today on our clients without having done a stitch of research.

  5. Al Veoli Says:

    Desperado, why don’t you come to your senses and admit these jokes are funny. Besides, you’re using them with your clients aren’t you?

  6. SuperFlySnookums Says:

    I hate to admit it, I liked the mistress one. Nice work, Al.

    I only mildly want to strangle you now.

  7. Al Veoli Jr. Says:

    WTF! WTF! I waited in the rain for 2 effin hours at will call Dad! Did your assistant/mistress/male secretary NOT get you tickets???
    And oh btw; there’s a guy on here that calls Nana a whore. Do you know him? Is it true, is Nana a whore?

  8. Al Veoli Jr. Says:

    Reminds me of the lesson you taught me back at Thanksgiving ’93:
    A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is
    finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
    The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs
    downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob , the
    next-door neighbor..
    Before she says a word, Bob says, ‘I’ll give you $800
    to drop that towel.’
    After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel
    and stands naked
    > in front of Bob , after a few seconds, Bob hands her
    $800 and leaves.
    The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back
    upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, ‘Who was that?’
    ‘It was Bob the next door neighbor,’ she replies.
    ‘Great,’ the husband says, ‘did he say anything about
    the $800 he owes me?’

    Moral of the story:
    If you share critical information pertaining to credit
    and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

  9. Desperado Says:

    Ok it was kinda funny… But just that one.

  10. Six Gun Says:

    can this f’n guy just leave the country already

    http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D9BKCLQG0&show_article=1

  11. jimmy roase Says:

    youdont use the right guys on the floor, pal

  12. Six Gun Says:

    there are guys on the floor still?

  13. Randy Spears Says:

    Al I saw a porn with your grandmother in it yesterday Foul Tip 4

  14. Unemployed Says:

    http://www.streetjobs.org

  15. Bernie Madoff Says:

    You forgot about the Green Genie!

  16. Johnny Wall Street Says:

    In the Know : Jewish

  17. Al Veoli Says:

    Gee, I had thought it was your wife in that flick.

  18. Dopey Says:

    Anyone hear from Marine Joel..?

  19. Wall Street Tool Says:

    Spot on Dopey….

  20. Al Veoli Says:

    Hard to believe these posts are 2 years old. I’m still doing the same thing as before (tho 2 years older); the wife is 2 years older and still bangable, and I have kept my wiener in my pants except at home. She is happier that way, and who wants to start with another broad all over at my age!

  21. Slacker Says:

    Settle down Al. She is far from bangable .

  22. Al Veoli Says:

    Sure she is. I don’t have the problem this fella has. This ain’t me and the wife. Read on:

    “A man and his wife are returning from holiday, while on holiday they decided to buy themselves some pets, he bought a snake while the woman got a skunk. As they are passing through airport control they notice a sign which says ‘NO ANIMALS WILL BE ALLOWED THROUGH QUARANTINE’ Slightly distressed the woman turns to her husband and asks what they should do. After thinking hard for 5 minutes the man come up with a plan ‘what I’ll do is tie the snake around my waist and try to pretend that it’s a snake skin belt’ ‘Yes’ the woman replies ‘but what about the skunk?’ ‘I don’t know, you’ll just have to hide it up your skirt’ ‘but what about the smell?’ the woman asks. To which the man replies ‘Look, if it dies it dies!’

  23. elvis Says:

    you’re a class act al

Leave a Comment

Please note: Comment moderation is enabled and may delay your comment. There is no need to resubmit your comment.