I have no problem trading with you but I never see you out there. – Oh please -and you wonder why we Bloomberg, IM and call you all at the same time.
Your research guy isn’t hitting with the right people. – Like that matters. I can name at least three execution only shops you’re doing business with today.
Could you please take me off your distribution list. I’m trying to cut back on the amount of email I receive. (Translation – you and your firm are shit)
Indian Giver -This guy likes to give you 25k or 5ok shares, tells you he’s got some size to do and then crosses 780k in a darkpool. His parting words just after popping your bubble are usually, “I’ll get you on the next one.”
Grenade Tosser – This is a bad bad guy. For some reason the street still gives this prick prints he doesn’t deserve just to keep his business coming in the door. “Do you want to compete or not?”
Bad Santa – Watch out for this guy. He’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing. “Hey can I sell this to you right here? The stock is fine and I was just hit by a size buyer – I just need to raise some cash” Hey thanks for thinking of me and not giving it to the large natural buyer – And buy the way you forgot to mention it was just downgraded by the number one analyst on the street.
Math Whiz – “You may be down 30% but my overall commissions are down 35%, so you’re actually up” Nice try piker.
Sorry we don’t do broker dinners… Uh hello? Do you forget my buddy Joe covers you at Slut Securities… And and know for a fact he didn’t get home til 2am.
